sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
