Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize