Quick, to the slutcave!
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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