Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Randomize
