What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
