Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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