dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
