i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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