**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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