I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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