He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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