i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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