i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize
