if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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