a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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