he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
