I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Randomize