I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
as a side note pls kill me
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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