You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
