Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
you win again, gameday.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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