Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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