no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
D3 body, D1 cock
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
