My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Randomize
