what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
