Plan B is the new Plan A
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
4 words: hood of his car
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
Randomize
