it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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