Kiss
Puke
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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