I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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