I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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