how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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