Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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