He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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