Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Vodka?
Forever.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize