Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
my mouth tastes like poor choices
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
