brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
