Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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