$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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