Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
