I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
