don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
