Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize
