Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
