ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Randomize
