i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
