..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
