The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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