How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Randomize
