Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Randomize
