What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
