There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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