How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
