everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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